Rockhampton Cricket Club - The Tour Guide

TOUR!! Tour… tour… it’s a word you can’t help but say with unnecessary emphasis on the ‘T’ – An emphasis that denotes the ‘kid in a sweet shop’ level of fervent excitement that overcomes the adult male when he fantasises about a week devoid of responsibility, devoid of pressure and more often than not, devoid of intelligence. It is an emphasis that hides a thousand sins and many more magical moments.

Only on a Rockhampton CC cricket tour can Rob Baxter take 7-21 with lolloping off-breaks, can George Fensome open the bowling with a ten-man catching cordon, can Lionel Watts take a steepling catch on the boundary, can Mike Thomas be likened to Steven Harmison, can Jerry White ride through the Glen and can heroes be born by eating flumps, downing Newcastle Brown Ale and spinning their heads round a stump till they have all the elegance of Adrian Savery gate-crashing Catherine Tyler’s wedding.

Yes the rules still apply, ‘what goes on tour stays on tour’, so this is merely taster for you. You have to be there.

Tour always starts at the Common and it always starts with a breakfast, a beer, a backpack, some banter… and a horse (of course). The RCC tour horse is the first name on team sheet no matter where we are heading. What else are we gonna use if the bus breaks down?

Legendary bus drivers in recent years include Wells, White and Douds and if there is a role in any political, social or cultural organisation in the world that is subjected to more bullying than the RCC Tour bus driver then I’d like to see that.

You have got to be thick skinned. Biters need not apply Thommo…

Did Eddie Twemlow really take all ten wickets in a tour match in Tenby as reported on the back pages of the Thornbury Gazette?! Only those who were there will really know but whatever the truth, the legend will live on…

Tour Tips – Never raise your bat unless you have been counting the runs yourself. If they’re applauding your fifty you probably have 32 – Always wear shorts – Don’t even think about looking in the fines book – And stop biting, Thommo. Oh yeah and if Dave Peacey is within a 2m radius of you, you better have an escape plan.

Tour Costs – Macca usually finds some dirt cheap accommodation where they serve sausages made with sand fresh off the beach and the rest of your money can be squandered at any number of culturally enlightening establishments. Bring your ID.

Tour Facts – Tour is well good innit!

Details are emerging very early of next years tour which is being organised by William Tyler. He is looking into a return to St Ives but is only willing to spend time and effort organising this if he gets positive responses from the cricketers, which is something that has been lacking in the past few years. Will can be contacted on 07921 397054

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